March 3, 2019:

Grey divorce refers to a demographic trend that has witnessed an increase in the split or separation of older couples who have been married for a long time.

Grey divorce or Silver Splitter or Diamond Divorcees is a term referring to the demographic trend of an increasing divorce rate for older ("grey-haired") couples in long-lasting marriages.

Grey divorce refers to a demographic trend that has witnessed an increase in the split or separation of older couples who have been married for a long time.

The term began to be used in the United States in 2004, but the practice had already been prevalent for about 20 years. Research shows that the overall rate of divorce in the United States has declined over the past 20 years, but the divorce rate of people over 50 is on the rise.

Statistics on Grey Divorce

Few years ago the AARP conducted a study titled The Divorce Experience: A Study of Divorce at Midlife and Beyond.

Some of the findings consisted of:

Who initiates divorce in later life?

  • 66% of female participants initiated divorce
  • 41% of male participants initiated divorce

Participants age when divorced

  • Age 40-49, 73% of participants divorced in their 40's
  • Age 50-59, 22% of participants divorced in their 50's
  • Age 60-Older, 4% of participants divorced in their 60's or later

Reasons for Grey Divorce Divorce is one of the most challenging parts of anyone's life, but sometimes it is inevitable. The social stigma surrounding divorce has gradually diminished over the years, but it hasn’t led to an overall increase in divorce except among people over 50. The question of why grey divorce has been increasing can be best answered by analyzing the aspects of life that affect long-term marriages.

Financial Management Financial matters are the primary issues that arise during a grey divorce. Finances can be tricky to handle, especially when one spouse has challenges managing them. Couples who struggle with debt or constantly fight about finances often end up divorcing.

On the other hand, if one of the partners earns all of the money in the household & ; therefore, makes all of the decisions involving money, problems may arise. Divorce can be also be caused by a partner's overspending habits or mismanagement of funds. Research has shown that marriage grows stronger when the husband increases his earnings; conversely, the marriage more often fails if the wife's earnings increase.

Growing ApartWhen you ask a couple why they have opted for divorce, you will usually hear answers such as "it was just not working out" or "we just grew apart." Couples in grey divorce may have realized later in their lives that they lost the spark they had when they first married. Considering that the stigma around divorce is diminishing, they decide that divorce would be the best course of action.

Couples could choose to start the divorce proceedings after their children are grown & have left home, leaving behind what is known as "empty nest syndrome." Most often, partners dedicate their lives to raising their kids, & once the kids have grown up & left, they are left wondering “What’s next?” They do not recognize the person they had married years ago, & divorce becomes an option.

Infidelity Baby Boomers tend to be individualists, placing their needs & happiness ahead of that of others, & that can lead to infidelity in marriages. Infidelity is another major reason for grey divorce. Cheating does not carry the same stigma it did in earlier times, & this has led many married couples to stray. Many dating sites hook up married persons with temporary sexual partners, thereby encouraging infidelity. Older men may start finding younger women attractive. The same could apply to older women who are attracted to younger men who are better looking.

Better Health & Life Expectancy Rates Life expectancy is much higher today than for generations prior to Baby Boomers. Life spans have drastically increased, & even at age 50 or above people think they have time to discover what makes them happy in marriage. Older people have stopped shying away from the idea of divorce after drifting away from their partners because they still believe they can find happiness.

Access to great health care & the availability of activities to keep an individual mentally, physically, & psychologically active have encouraged people to seek partners who suit their interests & attitudes when their marriage partner has failed to stay healthy, fit & active.

Addictions The first thing that often comes to mind when one hears about divorce is infidelity. However, there is more to divorce than one partner being unfaithful by having sexual or emotional relations with someone else—one could be unfaithful in many other ways. Addiction is an example of another form of unfaithfulness. An individual could be addicted to drugs, alcohol, gambling, or pornography, & these addictions might derail a marriage.

Many marriages fall apart when an individual puts their habit above the needs of their families. Dependencies, such as gambling place financial strains on the marriage & eventually lead to divorce. There are people who bet & lose all their assets & must start from scratch because they choose to gamble instead of providing for their future & family.

Implications of Grey DivorceGrey divorce can still affect adult children, even though they often have grown & left home. The process of adapting to the change in family dynamics can be difficult. The children are accustomed to a single family unit, & they now have to deal with a split family. Children may be trapped between their parent's feuds & may be forced to take sides, which is not very pleasant. Older children have problems adapting to their parent's dating life or the new family they choose to start. Grey divorce also has a significant impact on family finances.

The division of assets & property can be fraught with peril. Dividing property that was accumulated during the marriage can be complicated because life insurance policies, Social Security benefits, investments, & retirement benefits must be considered. If one of the spouses depended on the other throughout the marriage, it might be difficult for him or her to transition to independence. Their life course is disrupted & they have to adjust the standard of living they have to ensure they can afford it, even after the divorce. For instance, if the husband has been in charge of handling the finances throughout the marriage, the wife might experience difficulty after the divorce

There is Light at the End of the Tunnel Divorce can be difficult & emotionally draining, especially after long-term marriage. Joining a support group or finding a family lawyer you trust to guide you through the process can help you throughout the process.

Trend in India

A Leading Divorce lawyer cites that in the last 10 years, the percentage of older divorce cases has almost doubled in India. She explains why: “In our times, terms like ‘personal happiness’, ‘personal space’ & ‘peace of mind’ have become important life goals. Without the distractions of work & children, these things become more apparent to couples who don’t have any shared interests, children apart.” Source Link

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